Prayers unuttered

 

I am a person who needs interaction. I am by no means a complete extrovert, but I cannot live a secluded life. I feel my best when surrounded by friends and family, I am at my most comfortable when there are people I trust around me. That's not to say that I don't need sometime to myself - I often find that I need some time alone to process my thoughts and feelings but I always need someone (or a few people) that I can come back to. You can only imagine how I enjoyed myself at the college hostel - constantly surrounded by friends and never really alone. Even when I took a stroll by myself, there were always others around - and albeit we never conversed, their presence was a comfort in itself. 

But there have been times when I have felt alone amidst the crowd. When even the closest friends seem far away and in another realm altogether. All of us go through a lot in life and sometimes - its a bad day for everyone. On one such day, I felt completely drained, alone and fed-up with life. I was scared, sad and felt anxious of all the things that were to come. I made myself a cool glass of juice and spent sometime outside in the corridor, soaking up the last of the evening sun and breeze - all the while having an internal dialogue with God telling him how down I felt and how I would really appreciate a hug. I sighed, smiled and finished the last of my juice. 

"Well, thank you Lord for listening...I do appreciate the fact that I have you to talk to.", I thought as I walked towards the wash-area to wash up my glass. That's when I bumped into one of my friends from the other wing of the hostel. She just walked up to me and gave me a hug without a word - a warm squeeze of assurance. I was quite surprised - she never gives spontaneous hugs (I'm usually the one to initiate a hug). I laughed and hugged her back (glass in one hand). 

"Why the sudden hug?", I asked smiling. 

"I don't know", she said. "I just really felt like it."

I laughed and waved as she walked away smiling. And then I half giggled half cried.

"Thank you Lord for hearing all my unspoken prayers, all my un-asked requests. Thank you for always being there. Thank you for your inexhaustible love and care." 

Theresa.V